Project X Discussions

Hidden Factors

Are you often perplexed by why people do the things they do?  Often I oversimplify the reason by simply thinking they are incompetent.  I suspect they do not see things the way I do.  Often the reasons are hidden from you.

These hidden factors could be simply be things like they could just had a fight with their spouse or a bad review from their boss.   I keep reminding myself I cannot see things through their eyes.

After that reminder, hopefully I become more curious about their point of view and listen more carefully to discover what is really going on.

I remind myself that nobody intentionally makes mistakes.  If they appear to intentionally make a mistake, I must remember to did deeper.  

 

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team Discussion Part 2

One of the most compelling ideas in the book is the concept of team work.  The example used in the book is a basketball team.  If you have a really good player but he does not care if the team wins or loses but how many points he makes, he really is not helping the team.  I understood the concept in the team sport where the measurement of success of the team is easy to measure.  Moving the idea into business teams, the key really is to create agreement on the meaning of winning and how to keep a team score as opposed to individual scores.

In the last blog I talked about the challenge of the consulting firm we formed many years ago.  We were all practicing consultants and measured our individual revenue and sales contribution.  The difficulty was measuring the success as a team.  We certainly evaluated each partner on their own performance and did that well I believe.  However I am not sure we worked well on the common goal.  The difficulty was we did not have that clear measure of the team score.   Particularly in consulting organizations and many professional firms, the firm is a collection of individuals who are highly skilled and working on their own practice.  The senior people often have juniors working with them but rarely do the partners work together on anything but overall management issues.   

We had a code word for our problem and we called it "overall management."  Based on the above analysis. we were not far from the mark.  From the book, we had a problem with "team 1." 

I am now wondering what we could have done differently.  I wonder if the partners were evaluated more on the overall performance of the firm and less on the individual performance, would we have performed more like a team?   Each one of the partners was more focused on their team and not on the success of the "team one."    I think the partners were committed to the success of the firm in their own way but did not know how to solve the "team one" issue.

How many times in a team effort we focus on the shortcoming of one member rather than treating it as a team problem? 

Applying the idea from the book are really a challenge, I will continue to ponder these issues and write more later.  I welcome any comments or thoughts. 

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team Discussion Part 1

This blog is a continuation of my discussion of the ideas in the book.  See last weeks blog.

I have been thinking about the book and how the lessons could be applied to my previous experiences.  Several years ago we formed a consulting firm and we did very well for several years and I think the partnership became dysfunctional.  After reading the book, I think one of the problems was that we did not share a common goal.  We were a highly talented group of individuals who wanted to further our own goals.  

In the book, at each of the team building sessions the new CEO introduces the session with the challenge for the executive team, a highly talented group of people who were under performing their competition.  I think that also was one of our problems.   The CEO kept reminding the team that their challenge was to take leadership in their market.  

So what went wrong with our consulting firm?  Initially after we formed the firm, our goal was to be able to continue our consulting practice serving our client well.  As we became more successful and the partnership matured, each partner was pursuing his own practice without much thought to the overall success of the firm.  I think each person's assumption was that if I can be successful, the firm will be successful.  We were a bunch of people building our own practices.  Anybody who took his eye of his practice and focussed on the firm would lose his power to contribute to the revenue.    

We had some common values and did quality consulting work and served our clients well.  The code word for our problem was "overall management."  I now see that likely we did not share a common goal and wanted to develop our own parts of the business.  

So what might we have done differently?  At the time we did try some team building exercises but they were of the type that took us out of our environment and did some good exercises.  The difficulty we had was translating the lessons into our work environment.  

I think some stronger leadership on the working on our common goal and making some hard decisions about people who did not share the common goal.   I wonder if we had read the book and worked through some of the dysfunctions of the team would things have turned out differently.

I encourage all organizations to take the ideas from the book seriously and treat the challenge of building a team a a work in process.   

I welcome peoples comments and reactions to the book.    

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team - Introduction

Someone recently recommended I read "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team" by Patrick Lencioni, a leadership fable.  It is a fabulous book and one I heartily recommend.  We discussed the book at ourSenge Circle, a business book discussion group. 

The setting for the fable is a new CEO has been hired to head up a electronic firm in Silicon valley and does not have a technology background but lots of leadership experience.  The book is a compelling and easy read.  The concepts are simple and implementing them is difficult and complex. 

In another book we discussed at Senge was Made in Canada Leadership the book described how leaders end up as leaders.  One is a accidental leader, those that end up in leadership by accident, and the others is a leader that set out to become leaders.  I discovered that I am an accidental leader and only take leadership when I find myself faced with a challenge.  I do not seek out leadership but take it when necessary.   I also think that when I have taken on leadership things have gone well.  I do not however seek out these opportunities.  

In the Five Dysfunctions book, the CEO talks about the experience of teams in a sports context and how dysfunctional a team can be if one member is only focusing on his achievement as opposed to the success of the team.  I observe in myself that I really enjoy golf which is not really a team sport but more individual.  I expect that means I do not seek out sports that involve teams but I do find when I play as part of a team I do enjoy myself. 

The question I ask myself is "Am I a team player?"  When I am part of a team, I certainly make every effort to contribute and do not look for my own glory.  I will have to observe myself, and look at how I participate as part of the team. 

Another thing that makes a team player is that she focuses on the overall results of the team and not her performance.  For many of us, we have so much of our ego involved that we focus only on our own performance. 

The key ingredient in creating a team is trust, which is such a small word for such a big thing.  Building trust is a important thing and one that develops over time and most constantly worked on.   A loss of trust can really create havoc on a team.  As we develop trust in others, we can be more open and honest with each other, admitting mistakes and asking forgiveness.

I will write more about teams and some of my dysfunctions in later blogs.

Jack Welch's ABC People Strategy

Did he have confidence, courage, or just a great determination?  He certainly was extremely creative and ambitious.   I am fascinated by many of his strategies.  ABC was one of the one's that really struck me. 

I think he really cared about people.  He had this theory about people in his organization.  He said there A's and B's and C's.  The A's were the stars, the B's were good guys and the C's had to shape up.  The C's were the botton 10%.  He felt that the bottom 10% should not stay with the organization.  I have wondered about that but on reflection clearly they did not fit with their job and should make a change.  He found it very difficult but when he asked someone to leave it was not a surprized to them and he said he treated them well.  It sounds a bit cold and callous and I think we will find it difficult but the people need to know that they must perform or they will be left behind.

In my consulting business, I fired several people and it was never easy but they were not surprized.  On reflection, I should have done more.   Several people just did not fit with consulting and eventually thwy left.  We should have given them severernce and gave them a chance to find a better fit.  By tolerating them in the organiztion I think demotivated others.   I used to criticize organizations that had an up or out philosophy.  I wonder if it was as bad as I thought.  

Jack really got me thinking.

Why Do We Use Four Letter Words?

Ever wonder why you swear or use four letter words?  Some people say it simply demonstrates our poor command of the language.  Others say it is simply laziness.

I am not sure.  I met a famous psychologist many years ago who was well known for using many four letter words in his theraphy.  After I met him I realized he was extremely well spoken and was certainly not lost for words.  I concluded his use of four letter words was intentional.  I asked him why.  He told me that it is the way we talk to ourselves so he used it to show he understood the person and to break down defences, or de fences.  So I wonder why we talk to ourselves that way.

I grew up in a small town in Newfoundland and the language on the street was pretty raw.  However at home we spoke in a more refined way with no four letter words.  I clearly learned two languages and could switch back and forth easliy.  I suspect that the street language was more free and authentic so the self talk came out on the street.   

I am not sure of this theory but I certainly know when I hit a bad golf shot my self talk is very raw.  By the way, I am now responding calmly and with understanding but being encouraging at the same time.  I am acknowledging my efforts to improve.    

Do Self Help Books Help

I was recently asked by a person doing a PH D research project to complete a questionaire about my use of Self Help books.  I realized that I have bought and read many.  I think I have bought more than I have read but still I have read many on many subjects.

I was asked what makes a good self help book.  My first answer is when the advice is sensible and practical.  Something I can use myself to deal with some issue I am concerned about.  Many of the books are too complex and impractical.  One book I really loved was "The Power of Now" by Tolle.  However I could not apply his great ideas.  I love his ideas but I did not know where to start.  Then I read "The Presence Process" by Brown and I found a practical process I could follow.

My first self help book I recall reading was "Children The Challenge" by Driekurs.  It was a very practical book about dealing with children's behavior in a family.  I found incredibly profound but practical at the same time.  The book had a very sane underpining of psychology.  I recall that "iron clad logic of social living is cooperation."   

I have read books on positive thinking, golf, spirituality, yoga, Tai Chi, and lots of other things.  I have listened to tapes and CD's in my car when I commuted to work about two hours a day.  

I have kept an open mind on most subjects and I am looking for new ideas.  Those that are practical and sensible I will use and the others I dismiss.  

I suspect some people think self help books are a waste of time but for me they represent an important part of my learning. 

 

How Can I Change My Behavior

Change is a difficult thing for me to do.  My behavior is based on my belief about life, the universe and everything.  Many of beliefs are kept hidden from me by me.  When my current situation is intolerable, then I start to consider changing.  

When I decide to change something, I must be patient and gentle with myself.

My Golf Game

I am currently struggling with my golf game and if I am going to improve, something must change.  To be clear about my problem in the summer my handicap was 18 and now it is 23.  That means the average of my best ten scores of the last twenty has gone up five strokes.  That is alot.   Over the last ten years I have worked hard to change my golf game to get from 23 to 18.  Now I am back to where I was.  

I have several bad habits in my swing that I have worked hard to change.  However for some reason these habits or beliefs keep creeping back into my game.

Get Help

My solution is to find someone who can help me change those habits.  I use a golf pro to help me change.  He is very careful not to make radical changes but I improve.  

Similarly I have needed several times to lose weight and I have used Weight Watchers to help me change my eating habits.  Again these changes often creep back.  

Based on my study of psychology, I know that changing my fundemental beliefs about how the world is very difficult and impossible to do on your own.  I need a coach or counsellor to help me change.

Another key in making changes is my readiness to change.  How much am I willing to let go of my strongly held and hidden beliefs.   

My experience tells me with lots of effort I can make some changes but I need help.  So if you want to change things in your life, find a coach or therapist who can help you change.  I also suggest you be kind to yourself and give yourself credit for progress.

Stages of Change

If you have set out to make a change and have made a plan.  The first time the circumstance arrises, you only realize afterwards you did not change.  You can berate yourself or give yourself credit and say awareness is the first stage in change.   The next time the circumstance arrises, you realize the situation while you doing it but do not change,  You again can berate yourself or say that is the second stage of change and encourage yourself.  The next time you anticipate the situation but still do not change.  That is the third stage.  The next stage of change is that you do the new behavior most of the time but sometimes go back to the old ways.  You can again berate yourself or give yourself credit because you have made a significant change.  I think in most cases this as much of change as you can expect. 

Accept Myself

I think the key thing for me is to encourage myself and not let all that internal chatter discourage me.  I must love and accept myself deeply and completely.  After all, I am all I got.

Discouragement And Encouraging Ourselves

Cause of Anti-social Behavior

When I exhibit anti-social behavior, I do it because I am feeling discouraged.  I have low self esteem.  However I am completely in control of my own self esteem.  How can you say that, Jim, what about all these terrible things that happen to me?  It is all a matter of choice.

Encouraging Myself

When I am playing golf and I make a bad shot, I have a choice on how react.  I can berate myself and get down on how stupid I am.  Or I can look at it a lesson to be learned about my game.  By looking at it a lesson from life, I find it more encouraging.  I can look at the positive of how lucky I am to be able to be out here.  There are lots of great things about being out on the golf course.

Recently I played with Jack and he made a bad shot and he was berating himself loudly.  I said to him don't give my friend such a hard time.  He laughed and it broke the tension.  

Watch That Inner Voice

  Try to teach your critic to be more encouraging.  Remember life is too serious to take seriously.

How We Learn Behaviors

Ever wonder why you do the things you do?

We do not learn things by reading them or by being told.  We learn from life's expereinces.  We develop a model about how the world is and remember things that reinforce that belief.  We form most of our world view by the end of elementary school.

Enough preaching let me use myself as an example.   I have always felt that I am not big enough for many tasks.  In order to prove that to myself I have a early recollection.  I remember one time when I was about three or four, walking down the road with my dad and trying make my steps as big as his.   This memory reinforces my belief about how the world is.

My first girlfriend broke off with me after we had been an item for nine months.  I was completely blind sided.  It took me years before I had relationship that lasted more than nine months.

So what's my point.  If you are wondering about why you behave a certain way, your early recollections might give you some clues.  These are memories about a specific incident that you can say "I remember one time ........."   The big clue is how you felt about it.  

Sometimes you have a hard time seeing it yourself, but if you have a trusted friend, he/she might help.

So when you do something that baffles you, consider how you view the world.  If you want to change, try to modify the belief with "sometimes."   I do not believe I am not big emough all the time, only sometimes.  Get the idea.